Relationship

Don’t Fear Marriage

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Are you afraid of taking that step towards marriage? Don’t be. I took that step once and failed epically. But it hasn’t stopped me from starting all over again.

I wasn’t afraid to take that plunge a second time. I still want my happily ever after. I know that sometimes in life, I just have to swim against the tide to get there.

Yes, heart breaks I have had many failed serious relationships within a short span of time (and many many more if you consider my whole adult dating life)... and even a failed marriage which lasted 5 years. heartbreaks, even more criticism, and judgment from others.

But you know what? All that passes, and it passes faster than you expect it to. One moment you feel like your heart has been ripped out of its cavity... then the next moment, you find some reason to smile. (I use moment in the very loose sense of the word, of course).

Still, it's much better than sitting on one relationship for years on end when it's not right for you. It took me years to get out of my first marriage because I felt I was in too deep to pull out. Like it was too late, I’m married and I should accept my fate. And finally,.. when things at home got worse and worse, I realised that if you stay in a bad relationship or marriage, it won’t get any better or easier plus you are only wasting even more of your precious time (and his!). Your youth passes you by so quickly my friends, it really does.

Yes, marriage is an important thing and you need to think it through carefully before deciding to get married. But when you're mature, in your 30s plus, it seldom takes like 4 years for you to know if she's the one for you or not. So, my friend (and anyone else in this situation. I ask...  what's holding you back?

If you’re in a relationship but something about it is keeping you from wanting to get married... ask yourself - Can you fix it? Yes- then do you want to fix it? Yes- so fix it and get on with it!

But if you know deep down inside you don't intend to marry him/her... then don't string that person along. It's not fair. You're keeping them away from their happily ever after too. So please... shit or get off the pot!

The worst thing you can do to a person (who wants to settle down) is to hint at marriage, keep them keen and then string them along for years because you're "uncertain" and you fear marriage... then the relationship ends. After which... somewhere down the road, you meet the right person and get married within months of dating.  Your ex will HATE YOU FOREVER for this, because you wasted years of her time and yet was not ready to get married. This goes both ways, men and women alike.

The thing which most people don't realise though is that when it's the right match, the decision comes so much easier and quicker. (Unless you're very very young lol... cos when you're still a kid, you fall in love and immediately want to marry him/her without regard of finances or much else.. lol that's a different story) .

It is not time that will "tell". It is your own volition. Make it happen.

Do you agree?