In every adult relationship, there will come a point where you find yourself asking… is he a keeper or am I wasting my time? Do you decide based on a gut feel or are there glaringly obvious signs as to whether he’s a good man for you? Here are some tests which naturally crops up in every normal couple’s relationship. Pay attention to them when it happens and you will find your answers.
Test 1: Unbottling the Crazy
We all have quirks – they’re what make us all so fabulously interesting and unique. But the trick when it comes to finding the right guy is to find one that appreciates everything about you – especially your quirks. When things are new it can be tempting to keep the more unconventional parts of your personality behind closed doors, but let them out and you will see if he appreciates you exactly as you are.
Test 2: The Crisis
When you have a big problem, see how he steps in. If you’ve lost your job or there’s a family emergency, you’re going to need more than just a sympathetic hug. You’ll need a man who will back you up and be there for you. So when a crisis occurs and he can handle all the drama with ease and be there for you unconditionally, I say he’s a definite keeper.
Test 3: The First Argument
Your first big argument as a couple will tell you a lot about the kind of man he is. You simply do not know someone until you’ve had a fight with them. Pay attention to how fast and easily does he erupt and how long does the anger last. Someone who easily loses their temper, and lacks rational, problem-solving skills, will be nearly impossible to live with in the long term. Finding a man who can fight fair and who doesn’t need to get the last word every time you argue is important.
Test 4: The Flirt Test
When you’re at a party, look at how he socialises. Separate from him, and then watch him while he’s solo. If he is just having civil conversation, fantastic. If you see him touching and complimenting other women and his eyes roving all over the place then that’s not good. I would not recommend devoting a lot to a guy who flirts a lot. If that’s the kind of person he is, that’s the kind of husband he’ll likely be.
Test 5: The Game Test
Whenever you play a game with him, it could be a board game like Scrabble or some arcade game, pay attention to more than just the game. Is he a humble winner? And more importantly is he a good loser? How a guy loses can tell you who he is… especially if you’re the one that beat him! How a man responds to defeat tells you how mature he is.
Test 6: The Friends Test
When you meet his friends, how do you feel about them? If he has friends that are good men as well then it is a reflection of the kind of person he is, the type of people he really likes and wants to associate with. Also pay attention to how he is influenced by others. You want a man who stands his ground and is not easily influenced by others’ thoughts or opinions. There’s nothing worse than a man who is unpredictable, indecisive, and caring too much about what other people think.
Test 7: The Money Test
Who pays for most of the dates? Yes in this day and age, women can earn as much or more than a man so it is normal that a woman pays for some of the dating expenses. However, does he take all that for granted? A truly good man has the desire to provide for his loved ones and would never feel comfortable freeloading, or taking financial advantage of his woman.
Test 8: Promises and Delivery
When he says he’ll do something, does he do it? A good man walks the walk. He doesn’t just talk and tell you what you want to hear. Do not be fooled by lip service. This is considered pacifying you when words are all he offers. A relationship can’t work happily when a man keeps saying he’s going to do something and doesn’t. There must be follow through. If it’s just words you’ve heard so far, and no actions, then he’s not worth keeping.
Anytime these situations crop up in your relationship, pay attention! Don’t take these situations for granted, and don’t just shrug them off. They are the tests which will show you whether or not your man is a keeper.