So, if you want to prepare yourself for what’s in store, or just want a giggle over the uncanny resemblance to Chatty Cathy or Moany Maggy, keep reading for some of the most common workplace personalities.
1. The Charmer
In every workplace, there’s one person who will charm the socks off people without even having to say anything. Maybe you’ve fallen for their puppy dog eyes and get roped into doing their filing, or maybe you’re on the other end of the stick and can see right through the tricks that are fooling your boss. Whatever the case, you know they can glide through their workday effortlessly just by telling Jane in Accounting that her hair looks nice or Jo the receptionist that her shoes are to die for!
2. The Wise Guy
This worker is always cracking jokes, has incredible wit and literally has an answer for everything. Although they’re great to have around to entertain you for a while, it’s no fun if you’re on the receiving end of their smart remarks! Sometimes you’ll completely love their gutsy personality, but other times you wish they’d just put a sock in it.
3. The Gossip
We’ve all encountered a gossip or two in our lives. You know who I’m talking about: the colleague who just happens to know everything about everyone (they even have digs on Paul from Accounting who hasn’t whispered a word in the two years that you’ve been employed). They live for office scandals and spend most of their day discussing the details – whether true or false – with anyone they find in the communal kitchen.
4. The Workaholic
You’ve probably seen more of the back of their head than their face because they’ve always got their head glued to their PC screen. These types of personalities at work tend to put the rest of us to shame, making us feel like we aren’t working hard enough if we don’t sleep, eat and breathe work. They are always the first ones in the office and the last ones out. In fact, they might even have a sleeping bag hidden under their desk, because they just love work that much!
5. The Procrastinator
You don’t actually know what this person’s job duties are, because they procrastinate so much. Every time you walk past their screen, they’re scrolling through Facebook, looking for cooking recipes or texting their friends. They never seem to actually be doing any work but always complain about their heavy workload. Then they spend an hour every day doing overtime (which makes them seem like they are working hard), but that’s just because they spent the better half of the morning reading BBC News.
6. The Lone Wolf
This type of coworker can always be found enjoying the silence of their own company. They never talk to anyone in the break room, they shove their headphones in during work hours to avoid any type of conversation, and they turn up to work-dos but still sit in a corner. Even though you’ve probably tried to include them in a group discussion, they’ve shown no interest whatsoever. So, you’re probably starting to think that they could be a serial killer!
7. The Oversharer
This person literally has no filter. They’ll tell you when they went to the toilet, what they ate for dinner, what they argued about with their partner and many other intricate details about their lives that you would have rather avoided. They are the type of person you avoid in the corridor; otherwise, you’ll get sucked into a 30-minute monologue about their child’s dance recital and roped into watching videos of them twirling in a tutu.
8. The Belittler
This common work personality lives to put you down and embarrass you. They wait for the moment that you make the smallest mistake to publicly call you out on it and ridicule you. Heck, they might have even set a booby trap for their own amusement. They’ll steal your ideas and take credit. They will manipulate your boss and spread rumours, doing all they can to make you pack up and run.
9. The Rebel
If you’re supposed to be in at 9am, this person will turn up at 9:05am. They will wear blue jeans when you’re only supposed to wear black, throw plastics in the bin instead of recycling them, and use the office printer for personal matters. They simply don’t care about office rules, and they work by their own book and clock but somehow still manage to get away with it.
10. The Hothead
This coworker is a ticking timebomb who gets worked up over the smallest thing. They have weekly outbursts about the broken printer and slow internet. They also have a mental breakdown when there’s no milk left in the office fridge, and when they’re given constructive criticism, their face turns the same colour as a tomato, leaving you petrified that a computer will be thrown at your head.
11. The Hypochondriac
You could literally sneeze, and this coworker has their antibacterial out and is wiping all their electrical appliances. They’ll tell you that they can’t breathe or they have a sore throat once a week, and they’ll often pay visits to their local GP. If you cough near them, they’ll put you in quarantine and will throw heaps of Vitamin C your way. They will call in sick to work once a month but are probably just recovering from the thought of actually getting a virus!
12. The Debbie Downer
The Debbie Downers never have anything positive to stay; they are always complaining about the company culture, the workplace facilities, their job role and Jim in IT’s lack of skills – and yet they have been one of the longest-serving employees in the company. You’ve come to the conclusion that they’ll probably never leave but just like hearing the own sound of their voice as they complain about every single aspect of the company.
13. The Fashionista
This stylish coworker will compel you to change your entire work wardrobe because they just look so fabulous every day. While you walk around in your scuffed Converse All-Stars, they look effortless in a combo suit. Their hair is never out of place, and you wonder how early they woke up to look this presentable for an eight-hour shift in the office.
14. The Kitchen Slob
The kitchen slob is the bane of everyone’s life. They leave dirty spoons in the sink, tip sugar all over the countertops, leave Bolognese remains in the microwave and spill coffee all over the floor. And even when you call them out in the office group chat, they still fail to accept responsibility and clean up after themselves.
15. The Foodie
Dieting in the office is impossible when there’s a foodie about. This type of worker will convince you that midday doughnuts are a good decision, or that your boring salad isn’t good enough for lunch, and pizza is definitely the way forward. They’ll ask about lunch orders at 9:10am and will bring you irresistible home-baked cookies on the day that you plan to start eating healthily.
With so many different types of characters in the office, it’s hard to identify common traits, but with this list of recurring personalities, you’ll be sure to have a giggle next time you come across one of them!
By Joanna Zambas
This article first appeared in Career Addict.